Source: The Journey with Shaykh Mikaeel Smith

Death is a principle idea in my faith. It is an unavoidable truth. But death is not a static isolated incident, it is not just of life as we know it. Death, in my faith is the start of another life, another journey towards final accountability of how we led our life. The discussion of death is not to be shied away from but to get comfortable with. Just as we speak about heaven and hell, we must remember we can’t get to either of those destinations without passing all the stations of Death.

One would think I would have been taught about it early as it’s so important. If life is a correctional facility, death would be the release. But I was discouraged from talking about it. So I developed an impossible level of fear about it. And as the human mind is not designed to suffer constant fear, my mind blacked it out. 

But then God put me in a situation where I was forced to face the thought of my mortality. Every physical episode would be followed by a serious psychological one. Sickness and sufferings compelled me to take stock of what is the meaning of this life, what is waiting at the end of all these. What I saw devastated me, when I realized what I lost and what mistakes I made and how I will answer to my Lord.

Thinking of death can make anyone depressed or anxious. But all praise to God that in my faith there are constructive ways to train the mind. I am writing this because I was blessed with the help to pull me out of that swirling darkness. God sent my way people to gently bring me back. Sometimes it was a crushing blow, sometimes it was an affectionate rebuke. And I am still in the process of learning. 

I am writing it down as a way to remind myself of the important parts of death, for a swift revision, when I don’t have enough time to go through hours of class lecture.

Importance of remembering death

To a muslim, death is the start of our journey back home. My soul yearns for that home, I feel I am not of this life. But it’s not easy, it’s a harsh event. It severs the link between the body and soul temporarily. What is worse though, is to arrive at the gate of death deaf, dumb and blind; to arrive unprepared. Death touches all things, that’s the truth. Knowing that and still not preparing for it is the worst kind of disaster which closes all doors of opportunity. 

So keep the truth of death in the forefront of our thoughts, with a healthy fear and hopeful heart (fear of our sins and hope for finally going back home). If we are in a bad situation remembering death gives us hope as this too shall pass, only death is the final end of this worldly life. And Alhamdulillah if we are in good state, remembering death protects us from being delusional; we can’t take any of this- money, career, house, garden, loved ones with us when we go back. So we do not grow unhealthy attachment to worldly things and we aim to do more good deeds (simplest of these is the tasbih).

And as a muslim I am told to not wish for death in the events of physical or financial or any worldly calamity. 

“Do not wish for death if you are exposed to a calamity. If necessary, say: Oh Allah! extend my lifespan if it is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.” [Sahih Muslim]

We are to live with humility, grace and joy. Life is amazing, it is a blessing from Allah. We appreciate such a wonderful gift but we understand that it’s not permanent, so we are not to get attached to its baubles. We are to love life because of the blessing that still surrounds us even when we are in a bad spot; the sunset, the sky, the breeze, our ability to breath, and do good. As long as my soul is attached to this mortal shell, I am to do as much as possible to please God as that is my retirement savings investment in the next part of my life. This life is full of opportunity with accountability, whereas the next one is final, without any opportunity and only accountability.

Remembering death frequently, aids us in three ways –

  • We repent faster, we keep our tongue moist with istigfars.
    • Opposite is to become complacent and putting off istigfars.
  • We become content with what we have, we are doing to leave anyways.
    • We are never content, we need more and more.
  • We find more energy in our worship
    • We get lazy or restless in worship

Another result of remembering death is to develop a soft heart. We as children are born with a soft heart and then we lose our ways. Remembering death with caution can break the crust that grows on our souls. 

A soft heart that feels deeply when aspects of the faith are mentioned. Without our finger on the pulse of our faith, our heart can become harsh. A hardened heart cannot experience serenity. To keep our heart soft, to protect it from becoming harsh we are told to do the followings –

  1. Frequently visit the places of remembrance and righteousness. If there are 40 believers in a gathering, one of them is beloved to Allah. So being in the company of those who Allah loves, keeps our hearts soft and kind.
  2. Think about your own mortality. Everything is just a means to an end, the end being going back home to our Creator. When we keep in mind that we are not perfect and we have to go back with our records back to Allah, some of the darkness of our heart dissipates and the light of faith makes it softer.
  3. Visit sick people, especially terminally sick. When we see the trial of sickness and people who are close to their end time, it puts everything into perspective.
  4. Go to the grave yard. Visit graves, remember all the good of that person who has gone back to Allah, and say prayers for them. When we remove the self from the race of this world and contemplate about those who left and we take time out to pray, the world loses its hold on our heart. Without the instant gratification, the heart can detox and become the soft shining lamp that it’s supposed to be.

Events preceding death

In this lecture we learn that few things normally precede death. The purpose of it is to make us mindful and aware. To get our affairs in order. These are – sickness, old age or white hair, anxiety, reduced eyesight and hearing. These are reminders to reflect and to seek forgiveness. We are not perfect, we can never be, and we commit sins even unknowingly, we cannot worship Allah as He deserves. So we should sincerely seek forgiveness from Him. Once death is at our door, we are out of time.

When a person is near to death, he/she is suffering or terminal, the psychological state of that person needs to be hopeful. A dying believer expects the best from his Lord, despite all the major and minor sins, he/she hopes that the especially merciful Lord will do right by him/her. We are not to meet the angel of death in despair.

When we go back home, we can have apprehension for we committed sins but our eagerness to be back to Allah should surpass that. Our Lord loves us more than our mother. Alla will give us what we hope for and protect us from what we are fearful of. Death means we are about to meet Allah for the first time, after praying all the years, we finally get to meet our beloved Master.

Death is difficult on every soul. Sometimes Allah gives a believer a hard death to expiate some of the sins that are still there, to elevate his/her rank. And Allah sometimes gives a non believer an easy death so that all the reward of his/her good deeds are complete in this life.

The most critical moment of a believer’s life is the last moment before the soul leaves the physical body. When a believer is close to death, when his/her perception of the world fades and the afterlife starts to clear, that is the time the opportunity of repentance expires. Because the test was to believe without seeing. And so shayatin tries to steal the imaan of the believer till that time. For this reason it is important to keep good company, as they can be around the death bed and keep reciting “لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ اللَّهُ”.

And this is also why Iblis tries one last time to derail the believer. We are told that we are at the moment of dying; there are two shaytans that appear in our left and our right. They appear in the form of our parents or anyone whom we are deeply attached to and in a desperate attempt they lie to us that our loved ones in heart are not believers. They try to trick us into leaving our deen at the last moment after which there is no repentance. And as Allah said (This applies to those who die in a state of disbelief in Allah. But those who repent before their death and mend their ways, their repentance will be accepted, Allah knows best.)

{Surely Allah does not forgive associating ˹others˺ with Him ˹in worship˺, but forgives anything else of whoever He wills. Indeed, whoever associates ˹others˺ with Allah has clearly gone far astray.} [4: 116]

Importance of leading a good life

That’s why it’s important to keep good company as they can recite the shahadah around us in our deathbed so that we can be aware of the delusions of shaytan, and if it’s a habit we grew in our life, we can rely on it on our last day. As humans our brain overrides conscious thoughts and goes on autopilot doing what it used to do in case of hardship. What can be more of a hardship than the moment when the soul is about to leave the earthly abode it is used to?

The habit of remembering Allah in everything we do everyday of our life creates the hope and possibility of a good ending of this life. Most of us cannot be in a constant state of imaan, our heart is like the blade of grass in the breeze. We aspire to die as muslims, meaning when the last seal is put on our record, the last action being that of a mu’min. So dhikrs are so important, not only it protects our nafs, disciplines it, but also becomes our default response when we are traumatized or delirious in pain or suffering. So we make the following dua after salah – 

“يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِي عَلَى دِينِكَ”

“O Controller of the hearts make my heart steadfast upon Your religion.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 3522)

There is no assurance of a good ending, so we strive to lead a good life befitting a good ending. If our relationship with Allah is the driving force of our life, it will shine on the last day on this earth as well, inShaAllah. When the angel of death comes, his presence reflects the quality of our journey. He is there at the last moment of our life, his speech is beautiful if we lived a spiritually beautiful life and vice versa. For a pious soul, the departure of the soul is as smooth as water pouring out of a jug, whereas for a wretched soul, it’s like a thorny stick being dragged out of wet wool (May Allah protect us).

Therefore the message here is to live our life as beautifully and pure as possible every moment as that moment can be the last moment of our life. So the dua is –

اللهُمَّ اجْعَل خَيْرَ عُمُرِي آخِرُهُ وَ خَيْرَ عَمَلِي خَوَاتِمَهُ وَ اجْعَلْ خَيْرَ أيَّامِي يَوْمَ أَلْقَاكَ

Allahumma-ja’alna khaira ‘umri akhirahu wa khaira ‘amali khawatimahu waj-’al ayyami yawma alqaka

“O Allah, make the best part of my life, the last part, the best deed, my last deed and the best day, is the day I meet You”. (Sunan An-Nasai’)